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On Two Years of Unexpected Change

It has been quite awhile since blogging, and I need to release in the way that writing allows me to do.

Tonight as I reflect on these two years of constant, exhausting change, I am ever reminded that change is in fact everywhere whether I like it or not.

Two years ago tonight, I was worried about where I would live in Erie as an intern, how in the world could I afford an unpaid internship? The next morning as my phone rang, I knew what was about to happen as I saw the number come up as DuBois, PA. I could hardly contain my excitement, fear, and surprise as I was offered a paid internship. In that moment, in those few seconds it took me to accept the offer, I was already doubting my  decision. As I told my Mom and she told me she was excited for me, as she told me I better not screw this up, I was so scared. This most likely would turn into a full-time position- was I ready?

I remember making call after call for the next two weeks as I desperately searched for an apartment and doubting myself even more. I remember at 7:30PM on January 6th realizing that this was all happening, I had signed a lease; I was doing this, it was happening!

I remember that meeting with management on the 6th, feeling so overwhelmed, so not ready for juggling five schools, but still at that point, not really sure what I had signed up for, sure that I would get a call rescinding the offer!

Those first weeks were so overwhelming, but I survived because people believed in me! I'm no quitter, so I pushed through, I'm still pushing through at times!

I never would have ever imagined that this would be my life- I often wonder when this amazing dream will end. But these two years have taught me more than 14 semesters of training ever could. I continue to be amazed that God chooses this to be my life in a season where day after day it becomes harder and harder to trust Him. He has placed incredible people in my life here and I am so thankful for each one. On my toughest days, I know who I can reach out to for support so that I can push through and remain grounded. On my best days, I am so grateful for those who share in my excitement, even just via text or phone.

This is my heart tonight, and maybe in some way, it will be a blessing to you.

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