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On My Three Beautiful Girls (part 2)

Tonight I am reflecting on 18 years of memories. Tonight I am sad. Tonight I am grateful. Tonight I am blessed. Almost 18 years ago to the day, I met my sweet girls for the first time- the girls that have affected me more than any other humans on the planet. It's hard for me to believe that they've been a part of my life for almost two decades.

When I met them, the love was instantaneous. Life was difficult for them. To say they were in a broken home is an understatement. Being a part of their lives gave me a front row seat to the horrors of abuse. My heart broke over and over, I looked on in horror as their little bodies were scarred, I wept at the verbal abuse. I cherished the hugs, I held onto hearing their voices. I was grateful to talk to CPS caseworkers, but it was a lot for a teen to take in. My girls they will forever be, and so often I am frustrated they are in this continuous cycle of seemingly endless struggle.

They're not little anymore, my three little babies have babies of their own. Our relationship has evolved over the years, and I am ever blessed to have the opportunity to watch them as they continue to grow into beautiful young women. Our bond has remained a constant for them and for me. I appreciate that especially in the last year, I am as close as I've ever been with them. I love witnessing their growth, I love hearing the insight resonate. I love helping them through this thing we call life. I am grateful I can support them financially as needed.

Not many people in my life truly grasp the significance they've had. After all, I was barely 13 and they were just three and four. That said, they shaped my life in a tremendous way, solidifying my desire to strive to change the world one child at a time, one person at a time. I appreciate life because of them, the little moments, the laughter, the tears, the hugs. I always knew I wanted to be a Mom, and my relationship with my girls only intensified that. 

I may never have children of my own, but I will always have my girls, they will always have me. I thank God for that. I am a better human for knowing them. When life is hard, I push myself harder so that I can be here for the little moments with them. They give my life purpose, and for that I am forever grateful.

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