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On Windows from Heaven

Last week I stumbled upon a video of someone taking an Uber in Phoenix. This wasn't just any Uber- it was a self-driving car. A few years ago, someone shared with me that they had taken one while in Pittsburgh. I was amazed, but didn't really think much of it. But, watching that video? I was giddy- I couldn't take my eyes off of it. Is it possible that soon I could have that, too? Is it possible that I'll have that freedom someday? I can only hope.

As I watched it for the first time, smiling from ear-to-ear, I also found myself becoming emotional. In that moment, I thought of the one person I wanted to share it with, knowing though I couldn't just send it to him. 

It's been about six months since losing my Grandpa, and though I know where he is- knowing he's with Jesus- at that time, I wanted desperately to share that with him. No person believed I would have the ability to drive a self-driving car more than he did. He reminded me of it almost every time I talked to him (which was often). Part of me truly believed that he would be able to watch it happen in his lifetime. Why wouldn't I? At 87, he was the healthiest man I knew prior to the last 22 days of his life.

His decline was quick, and as each month has passed, I wonder if it has really hit me. Have I truly grieved his loss? I don't know. What I know is that there is tremendous comfort in knowing that I will see him again. 

I love to do little things for the people around me as a way to show my appreciation for their presence in my life. Maybe it's because sometimes I find it difficult to form relationships, so I try to never take them for granted. Losing my Grandpa so suddenly reminded me how blessed I have been in that I haven't experienced a loss like this in almost 25 years. His loss, even at 87, was a harsh reminder that life is so fleeting. Do I fear death? No, but I do find myself being even more mindful of the preciousness of life these days. 

When I have the opportunity to drive someday, I pray that Grandpa will have a window from Heaven,  and that I will always be grateful for the little things in life, because those are the big things.


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